Archive for the ‘Tips & Tricks 4 Male Masturbation’ Category
The Monkey
November 30th, 2007 | 
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This one is great if you like to massage your scrotum with one hand while you masturbate with the other. If you’re right-handed, instead of holding your scrotum from the left side, cross your wrists (left wrist on top) so you’re grabbing your scrotum from the right side. You may have to bend your body to the right to get the best position. If you’ve never done this before, it will feel like someone else is holding your scrotum. Tip: As you masturbate with the other hand, press your fingertips and thumb into the cracks between your scrotum and each thigh, and gently massage those areas with slow, rhythmic movements.
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BASIC TANTRIC MASTURBATION
A book called “Masturbation, Tantra and Self Love” by Margo Woods. Moves the reader away from the notion of basic, everyday masturbation and through Tantric practices, she guides the reader into self love. Well, let me tell you that this book has become a bible for me.
I start each day with a self-love ritual that lasts approximately 30 minutes. My goal is to raise the level of erotic energy in my body so that I am on the verge of ejaculation. I then “kneel in the flame” for as long as I can, allowing the energy to fill me up. Oftentimes, by this point, seminal fluid is flowing out of my penis. I do breathing exercises and often concentrate on my “third eye,” the spot in the center of my forehead. I also count each deep breath I take. All of this breathing, counting, and concentrating on my “third eye” is a way to consciously control the erotic energy that is trying to push me toward ejaculation. But instead, I hover at the brink, filling my body with this wonderful, healing energy. Finally, I let go, usually when the energy has begun to subside on its own. (I must admit that there are times when my body has its way and I ejaculate, thus ending this meditation.)
Once my genitals have relaxed, I massage two areas: the soft spot in my perineum between my scrotum and my anus, and the soft spot between my anus and my tailbone. I massage each of these two areas in a circular motion 81 times. (The number “81″ has significant numerological importance to those into numerology. I don’t happen to be one of those people.) Counting to 81 helps me to concentrate on the meditation, rather than losing myself in the ecstatic sensations. Yet the sensations I experience send me into orgasmic delight. My body shakes and dances as the energy that has been stored up in my pelvis is released to the rest of my body. Often this massage leaves me limp and breathless. The neat thing is that if I have the time, I can start the process all over again. Since there was no depletion due to ejaculation, my “humming” body is more than happy to go to higher erotic states. Later in the day, I will have at least one self-love session that leads to an ejaculation. At other times, I will live in this energy for several days as I add to it each morning. The sensations careening through my body are difficult to describe as I go about my day filled with this incredible energy. Suffice it to say it allows me to live in erotic energy 24 hours a day.
In conclusion, I have often read that you cannot hope to love another completely until you learn to love yourself. I would add to this that one of the best ways to learn loving yourself is to learn how to make love to yourself.
Cool as a Cucumber
Cut a good-sized cucumber about 2″ (5 cm) from the end, leaving you with a cross section at one of the wider parts. Then use a small spoon to scoop out the cucumber 4″ to 5″ (10 to 12 cm) deep. You can use a knife if necessary to help form the hole you are scooping. Don’t cut yourself! You must be sure not to make the hole wider than the diameter of your penis, a tight fit is essential. After you have the right-size hole, place the cucumber on your penis. It should be tight enough to barely fit. You will notice a fair amount of suction if it is adequately tight. The inside of the cucumber naturally provides a good lubricant. Masturbate normally, moving the cucumber up and down your shaft.
WARM AS A CUCUMBER
Once you’ve hollowed out the cucumber, lightly boil or microwave it. This makes the flesh softer. Soak in cool water for a few minutes, and then heat it up under running warm water. Dry it, poke an air hole in the end, wrap it with duct tape for strength, lubricate it (optional), and have fun. You can also rotate the cucumber between your palms to spin yourself to ecstasy!
Self-Control Games
Experience different orgasms through self-discipline.
Stop & Go
Get some lube, and begin to masturbate in your favorite position, but right before you ejaculate, STOP! Put your hands down, or put them behind your head, so you don’t ejaculate. Let your erection get just a little soft, and then start again, and once again, right before you ejaculate, STOP. If you do this at least four times, not only will it prolong your session greatly, it will make you ejaculate a lot more semen.
Torture Yourself
Try 20 light masturbation strokes, from base to top, followed by 10 quick ones. Keep alternating. Most men can’t stand more than 10 minutes if someone else is doing it. This can be considered slow torture masturbation, you want to ejaculate, but you can’t. When you do, the orgasm is especially good.
Kegels for Men
Beat to the Clock
It’s especially good if the alarm has a fairly long ringing cycle. If it continues to ring as you begin ejaculating, it will heighten the sense of urgency and tension relief.
Tiny One-Fingered Circle
Hands Off
Don’t Touch it
It Pays to Relax
Serious Relaxation
Rub the head of your penis calmly enough so you don’t have the urge to contract the muscle that spasms during orgasm.Remain completely relaxed, and release all tension in your muscles, breathing, and anywhere else in your body. Free your mind, and don’t dwell on the pleasure or the hardness of your penis. Even when you feel like orgasming, remain relaxed and release the pleasure. Breathe normally. You will continue to build the intense feeling until you reach a point where you simply can’t stand it anymore. If you are skillful, you may even experience a kind of momentary blindness. Even when you feel like exploding, stay relaxed, enjoy the intense pleasure, and keep rubbing!
Paralyzed
The Baggie & The Mattress
Get a plastic sandwich baggie and put some lube in it. Then put your penis in and squish all the lube around so it covers your penis. Once that is done, kneel in front of a bed. Lift the up mattress and put your penis, with the baggie still on it, between the mattress and the box-spring. Start pumping as if you were having sex. When you’re done, all you have to do is throw away the baggie.
BOXERS & MATTRESS
Get two pillows and sandwich them under the mattress, wrap a pair of boxer shorts (or something else soft) around your penis, and fold a Kleenex into the end, over the tip. Then insert your penis between the pillows and pump away.
BUBBLE-WRAP & MATTRESS
Instead of using a baggie, use a piece of bubble-wrap (the plastic stuff used to wrap fragile items for shipment).
BAGGIE & MATTRESS & SOCK
After putting your lubed-up penis in the baggie, unroll a heavy sweatsock over the whole thing, like a condom. The sock shouldn’t have too much left over at the base of your penis, though, as it can limit your range of motion. Then put the whole thing between the mattress and box spring, or under a chair cushion, and go for it! The sock reduces possibly uncomfortable friction while still hugging your penis.
HEAT IT UP
Put some lube in a sandwich bag; then get a heating pad and fold it in half. Set the bag of lube in between where you folded the pad in half. Place the heating pad (still folded in half and turned on a low or medium setting, NOT high), with the bag of lube in it, under a couch cushion seat or between your bed’s mattress and box spring, and insert your penis into the bag and proceed like you’re having sex.
ADD A ROLL
Get a condom, a freezer baggie, a toilet-paper roll (with no paper on it), two pillows, a bed, and some lotion. First, lube up the baggie with the lotion and spread it all around inside. Next, feed the baggie through the toilet-paper roll and spread out the open end. Get two pillows and put them between the mattress and the box-spring, and then put the toilet-paper roll with baggie in between the pillows (open end out). Put on the condom and lube that up, too. Insert your penis into the open end of the toilet-paper roll, and pump away. The toilet-paper roll gives you that tight squeeze, and the condom prevents that uncomfortable rub from the plastic baggie.
Bathtub Fun
This method is also great because there is no mess to clean up when you ejaculate.You will also be able to experiment with some otherwise messy lubes if you desire.
This technique is an advanced method because it will require you to practice your EXACT position in the bathtub in order to masturbate without pain.
This time, you need to get the correct water temperature. Let warm water run for at least 3 to 5 minutes before placing your body under the water flow. Test the water with your wrist or forearm first. (The hands and fingers are not very good at sensing temperature.)
USE CAUTION: The penis is very sensitive and might burn sooner than your hands would under hot water.
Third, you will need to pull yourself in as close as you can to the stream of water. This is the tricky part in this technique. First, you will need to get your rear end as close to the water as possible. Next, you will have to lay down and brace yourself by pushing your hands against the back of the bathtub or wall and push your whole body forward as you lift your legs up in the air and lay them up against the wall with your feet facing the ceiling.
Tip 1 – Run the warm water in the bathtub with the drain plugged before you start. Otherwise, the bathtub floor is very cold when you lay down on it.
Tip 2 – The water provides a nice lubrication, but if you require more lubrication, here is a good chance to use some otherwise messy products such as Vaseline, hand lotions, cooking oils, etc. Some of the heavier lubes will not wash off in the water right away.
Oral Simulation
To simulate the feeling of lips sliding over the penis head: Lube up your erection and hold the shaft in one hand. Put your dominant hand’s index and middle fingers together horizontally, palm toward your face, in front of the penis head. Push the head into the gap between the fingers. The fingers should be relaxed, not tense. Now pull back and do this over and over the top third of the penis. Feel how the fingers conform to the penis’s contour as they slide over the head and back.
Where to Shoot Your Load
In a tissue
This is perhaps the easiest and most convenient way to get rid of your spooge. Keep a box of tissues near the bed or where ever you wank, and just grab one a little before the moment of truth arrives – or grab two, if you’re a high volume shooter. Just be sure you throw the used tissue out immediately; you don’t want to pick it up later and mistakenly blow your nose in it, or have a guest stumble on it by accident.
In a wet washcloth
Cumming into a warm, wet washcloth can be a pleasure in itself, and is definitely a step up from Kleenex. Use fabric softener in the wash for best results. Make sure you deal with the washcloth appropriately after wards. Don’t rinse it out and put it on the towel rack where someone might use it on their face. Put it straight in the laundry hamper.
In a sock
Socks are great – there’s usually one lying around, and they fit perfectly over your cock. Thick socks are best for absorption; dress socks are too thin. When you’re done, toss it into the laundry bin or toss it under the bed. Some people will reuse the same sock multiple times. The disadvantage is you end up with a lot of mismatched socks, but that happens anyway.
In a T-shirt
Another reliable spunk catcher is the T-shirt. If you’re not wearing one, there’s likely to be one within reach. A T-shirt also has enough material that, if you’re careful, you can reuse it for several sessions. The downside of using clothing is that you’ll always find yourself automatically checking before you go out to make sure your shirt isn’t crusty.
In a plastic bag
Got a drawer full of plastic bags from the grocery store? Here’s one way to recycle them. You can also use sandwich bags. Plastic bags clean and convenient if you’re masturbating someplace where you can’t immediately dispose of your spewage, like in a car. Put a little lube in the bag for a fabulous fake pussy.
In a condom
Similar to plastic bags, condoms allow you to shoot, contain your jizz, and toss at your convenience. Get the condom on while you’re still masturbating, then finish the job. If you want to keep your hands clean or avoid leaking precum on anything, you can put the condom on as soon as you start getting hard. It’s kind of a waste of a condom, but if you’re not having sex, you might as well get some use out of them. Also, you can leave the spent condoms in your wastebasket if you want people to think you’ve been getting laid.
In the plants
An eco-friendly solution to the problem: it wastes no water, creates no garbage, and it’s good for the environment. Spunk is 100% bio-degradeable and contains protein, minerals, and nitrogen that plants thrive on. Shoot into the soil of a houseplant, or into the shrubs outdoors. You’ll be doing the plants a favor by fertilizing them, and your friends will be impressed by your green thumb.
Into the toilet
This takes good aim, but it’s the tidiest method if you can pull it off. Simple and easy – one flush and you’re done. It’s a little unceremonious, but it leaves no evidence.
In the shower
Carefree jizzing is one of the many advantages to jerking off in the shower, along with privacy, lots of slippery stuff for lube (shampoo, hair conditioner), and multitasking as you tend to your daily hygiene. In the shower, it doesn’t matter if your jizz lands on yourself, the floor, or the tile wall; it all washes down the drain with a little hot water.
In a scrapbook
Do you like to keep a record of your accomplishments? Buy a large scrapbook with plain heavy paper pages. Before you start masturbating, lay the book open to a fresh page. When you cum, spew your wad onto the paper. Write down the date and any comments (volume, consistency, etc.). Let it dry completely, otherwise the pages will stick together.
In an ice cube tray
Another way to preserve your spunk is to take the cryogenic route. Cum into an ice cube tray and freeze the contents. Depending on the size of the tray, you should be able to store several loads. There’s no guarantee that your sperm will still be viable, but the cum-cubes can liven up your next party.
Into a shot glass
Squirting into a shot glass or small tumbler is cool because you can see the volume of your load and get a good look at the color and consistency. If you’re into drinking your own cum (and some guys are), this also makes it easy to toss it back – wedge of lime is optional. See above suggestion (ice cube tray) for a complete cum cocktail.
In your hand
Catching your jizz in your hand is sort of a last resort method for when you didn’t plan anything else, or your original plan was thwarted (no Kleenex in the box, couldn’t make it to the bathroom in time, etc.). Keep your palm cupped and your fingers together. Get to a sink as soon as you can and wash it down the drain.
Into your face/mouth
If you’re flexible enough, and you get off on tasting your own jizz, this can make you totally self-sufficient. Lie on your back and put your legs and feet up over your head so you’re bent double. Lying on the floor with your back pushed up against the wall can help. Position your cock over your face as you wank, then open your mouth and let the cum fall in. Close your eyes if you’re shooting on your face; semen in the eyes stings like hell. Advanced yoga practitioners and contortionists can use this position for auto-fellatio (self-sucking).
ROSY PALM
With some kind of lubrication, rub the tip of your penis head against the palm of your other hand. The resulting orgasm will be very powerful.
ROSY PALM & BLANKET
Lie in bed with a soft blanket on top of you; hold your penis with one hand and stick it straight up so the head is touching the blanket. Then with your other hand go outside (on top of) the blanket and try the Rosy Palm technique through the blanket. You don’t need lube; all you feel on your penis head is your soft blanket. You might not be able to continue this for long because of how sensitive your penis head can become.
ROSY ARM
Instead of rubbing your penis head on your palm, rub it on your forearm. You don’t need lube, and it’s softer than your hand.
The “Vagina”
Lie down on your side and hold onto your penis with the Backhand grip. Roll over further and brace your hand against the bed, and thrust your penis in and out of your hand. This closely mimics the movements of intercourse. It’s a very different feeling to masturbate by moving your pelvis rather than your hand. It’s also fun to put your other hand down and feel your scrotum moving back and forth as you pump in and out of the “vagina.”
“VAGINA” FINISH
If you like the “Vagina” technique but don’t have a lot of stamina or energy, masturbate normally until you can feel that if you don’t stop, you’ll ejaculate. At that point, wrap both hands around your penis and start pumping “Vagina”-style like there’s no tomorrow. This will be a very rewarding experience.
TWO-HANDED “VAGINA”
Kneel on the floor, and lay down a towel. Lube up well, and lock together the fingers of both hands, palms up. Place your erection in your hands, and wrap your hands around your penis. Then put your hands (and your erection) on the floor, and pump your pelvis front to back, without moving your hands. Throw your head back, close your eyes, and imagine having sex with your favorite Miranda’s Girl. You may have to lube up a few times, but it produces a very nice orgasm.